In Mommy news, Jared turned 3 months today...a quarter of the way to a year! Daniel is less than a month away from turning 3. And what are the boys doing? Jared is the smiley boy...he smiles whenever he recognizes one of our faces (mine, Daddy's or Daniel's!). He started grabbing at things like toys on the swing at daycare. He's been sleeping pretty consistently, still, and there's been a few times that he's slept all the way through the night until we had to wake him up to get ready. Daniel is chatty little fellow, and he picks up on so many new things so quickly. He can count to 15 pretty reliably, he's decent at telling us what color something is (he knows well enough to give a color as a response...whether it's the correct color or not is up for debate). He can name all of his toy cars and trains, and works the computer like a pro on a little PowerPoint that I set up with pictures of his trains. And this evening after his shower, he actually pee'd in the potty! It was an amazing moment (especially since neither Mike or I have seen him pee...only poop).
In the interest of professing something deep and philosophical, I'll switch to talking about some life change-type things and maybe some random bits of Mommy knowledge. As if I could word that more awkwardly. Here's also hoping that I can remember the dialog for this that I had running in my head earlier today.
It sounds cliche, but the whole thing about "everything changes when you have a baby" is true. It's happened twice to us, and things definitely change, but it doesn't necessarily mean that it has to be all good or all bad. Just different. I hope it is different with our next child(ren) as well.
The good things...it's made me become more patient. I like to think that I was pretty patient before having kids, but I've somehow acquired a more "relaxed" type of patience. I think almost everyone has the urge to rush things up or start to fidget when another person is taking a long time to complete a task. I try to set myself up to not have to be rushed, so that I do have the time to wait. It's not wasting time...it's just not stressing myself out. "Old" me would have her mind in another place or thinking about the work that needed to be done (thus not enjoying what is going on in the moment). I think it helps not only making time with the kids more enjoyable, but also able to deal with interns at work, students in one of my classes, or other people that I'm working with on a project.
Second good thing...learning to accept help. I'm still working a bit on this one, and it has many different facets to it. I don't mind if someone comes to help with the baby, or do something around the house like take care of dishes or cook dinner. I've accepted help in the form of childcare when I really needed a couple of days to recoup after childbirth (and not wanting to worry about having two kids at once...I could just focus on the newer, more demanding one). But on the flip side, I've not asked for help many times that I think I could have used it.
Third...deciding what's important to worry about and what's not (or "letting go"). House not completely clean the day after you come home with a new baby? Who cares! Trying not to do it all, especially not all at once. It's awesome to work hard and reap the benefits, but not if you make yourself ill as a result.
OK so now some changes that aren't all that great (I hesitate to call them "bad"). Worry. Where did this worry come from? Before, having to worry about ones own self was pretty much it. Don't get me wrong, I worried (in a healthy way) about Mike too, but it's a different type of worry aimed towards a child. When they are sick or hurt or something along those lines, it sends an indescribable sensation through your body. I have a weird sense of empathy, almost feeling what I imagine they must be feeling.
In the interest of time, I'm going to stop and continue this later. But I do intend to have a little spout about some of the ways that life is better, and some of the nuggets I've picked up on along the way!
